Missing...

Missing my dad, missing my mom...
Missing my grannies....missing a place called home.
Me in "missing" mode today.

Perhaps it's the rain that's making me melancholic today.

Alright....cheer up. Shake out and get going!

Back to work now....

Words of wisdom

"Whenever you focus your attention on what the other person is doing, you take away your own power. You make yourself weak. In focusing on the other, you try to control things you can't control. For that reason it's an exercise in total futility, inefficiency, and ineffectiveness.


When you focus on yourself rather than on the other person, you vastly increase your odds of being able to enjoy some impact and influence over the relationship problem that bothers you."

Words of wisdom indeed...

Looks like I need to stop focusing on what I cannot control. Sigh...guess life is like that. We waste alot of energy thinking, worrying and fretting over stuff that we completely have no control. I need to go into some cave and train myself on this. Ha...be remote.


I come to realise what someone said about me is very true. When I reach saturation point in my emotion, in order not to be further aggravate, I distant myself from that thing or that person. Sort of a defence mechanism. I shut myself.

On the bright side, for my birthday last week, my darling bought me a bottle of perfume that comes with a little purple bear. Pretty cute (i mean the bear). The scent of the perfume is a little too rosie for me but it isn't too bad. Guess it's growing on me. Then on the actual day, we went to Hard Rock Cafe for dinner. Shared a main course, a soup, a salad, one starter, two drinks and a mud pie. Oh...not forgeting the flowers! Well...I am contented la. No complains whatsoever...


One thing I must say, W has been quite patient with me. I have learnt to appreciate this strength of him. There is this one thing that he does which I am always secretly pleased. It's when he pray for us, for our marriage. It's like this standard yet sincere prayer that he utter for God to help us in our marriage. And he also make it a point to thank God for bringing me into his life.

Guess I just have to focus on these good things that God has put in my life so that the not-so-ideal stuff are overshadowed and become insignificant.

And one more thing....we are confirmed going to MGS this year!! I'm so glad we made it cos he was so unsure about his leave application. Looking forward now to 29 Nov. Heard the response this year is overwhelming. Hooray!!

The Ultimatum

I think I had the last straw now with her.

My mind is set too. I know this is going to be tough for W but she is CERTAINLY not going to stay with us.

Last Sat, W told me that she went on her usual gripping in the afternoon before his RT. Then at one point (dunno what they were talking about...he also cannot remember), she actually asked him if he is giving in too much to me? Next one is the best, "Are you henpecked by your wife?"

All hell literally broke loose when I heard these words from my husband. Whatever little compassion and respect I have had for her shattered into dust. I cannot imagine anyone would say these things to their children. What is she thinking? What is her motive? We are only married for 3 months and she is already trying to sow discord between us?!

I regret thinking for her welfare and considering for her needs. Just the same morning, while having breakfast with W, I went to pack this really nice porridge for her, thinking that she would enjoy it.

I couldn't even bring myself to talk to her the next day. I fear I would bite her head off.

This is really too much...totally nonsense.

Does threatening work?

W got a call from his mom to ask when we will be moving back with her. He told her we won't be moving back till we get our new place.

She terminated the call with these words "You will regret..."

I dunno about this....but I personally do not take 'threats' very well.

Honestly, one part of me is hoping that we do not need to rent like we are doing now as we are spending $400-500 extra every month just on rental. I could jolly well put these money into the bank and smile at the end of every year with a few thousands in our saving.

BUT I honestly cannot stand the thought of moving back to stay with her.
Simply for the following reasons:

> No privacy and boundaries - She doesn't value privacy, let alone knowing where her boundaries are. She used to always come into our room until recently when W told her off. Din take it well but at least it has stopped her wandering in sometimes. She likes to interupt our conversation. She has to 'win' in every arguement. She doesn't take 'no' very well. Basically, she wants to have the final say in everything.
> Repetition - She repeats herself over and over again. You can hear the same thing like umpteem times.
> TV - She turns on the TV in the wee hours of the morning. I am a super-light sleeper and the sound of the TV just wakes me up. Also she like to talk to you when you are watching TV.
> Her expectations - I have become the maid in the house now. I will be the one to wash up the stuff after dinner. There are silent expectation to wash her slippers and do some stuff in the house.
> Cleanliness - How about not washing your hands after visiting the toilet? Not to mention about the stuff you see on the toilet seat and floor. How about using your hand to touch and choose pieces of food when it's shared by everyone? Best part is when confronted, she said "This is how you have grown up....eating my saliva".
> "I am your mother" mentality - This is the most ultimate of all. Mother of all evil and root of all problem. In her mind, because of this fact, she has made things rather difficult. She doesn't even realise that her son is married.

Well...I think I should stick to our decision and stay out as long.

Just the thought of moving back to stay with her makes me DEPRESSED....

Do you get my point?

I'm back to work....
I'm back at work...
I don't want to work...
It's Tuesday blue. I get it every Tuesday (obviously!)

Man work to earn a living but they almost all the time end up working as if work is their only objective in life.

I always believe in living within our means. But the problem is we also tend to want to pamper ourselves abit cos we have worked so hard. And we end up pampering ourselves all the time cos we worked so hard all the time. Then we find ourselves working harder so that we can continue to afford to pamper ourselves.

Do you get my point?

Where to start ar??

> Finalise XXXX competition
> Tie up 2008 T Ctr
> Prepare a sermon
> Chase camp committee
> Organise bbq for P6 students
> Plan 2008 activities and budget
> Organise dance and guitar class for holidays
> Some more....some more....but cannot remember for now!

Maybe I should just switch off my computer and go find one corner and sleep.... ;p

Tada...Unveiling the brand new look!

Hee.....I always marvel when I go to people's blog and see all the fanciful stuff they feature in their space. Now I am also getting quite pleased with myself. Cos I have attempted to beautify mine.

Well...one thing for sure. You're not going to find pictures of me. Still not too comfortable with putting my photos on the blog. At least for now, there is some level of confidentiality and freedom to express myself without the embarassment of being 'found out'.

Not sure if I ever have the courage of broadcasting this blog to my friends or loved ones. So far, I know of only one person who check this blog. Others who find this blog must have discovered it by chance. When I was naming the blog, it took me a long while to come to this name. And I still think it fits me perfectly.

Depending on my creativity juice and work schedule....blog shall be subjected to more construction. Ha...ha!

Spare me a minute?

Can anyone be so busy to the point that you cannot spare a minute in the day?

I seriously doubt so...

What is 'a minute' to you?
- It can mean life to the person battling for his last breath.
- It can mean eternity to the mother who cannot find her child.
- It can mean a world to one who hears from her lover.

Never underestimate what can happen in a minute...it may be insignificant to you, but it can mean a whole lot more to someone else.

2.3k Rock

One of my friends is staging his proposal. He bought a ring that costs 2.3k!! Wow....I must say I am very impressed by his generosity. Well....he has always been a very generous person. And a good man. Ha...(hope he'll never discover this blog. If not, he will swell).

Last week was terribly hectic but fruitful. I came out of it physically tired but spirtually refreshed.

I read this last night and thought it is pretty interesting. The author says to treat your spouse with respect and love because your spouse is God's son/daughter. If we fail to do so, we are not only failing our spouse but we are also grieving God, who jealously guards his own. This is the first time I have been given this perspective. And I, of course, made my husband read it too! Ha...

Meeting up with a friend that I have not been keeping in touch for ages. We started our communication briefly just before I got married. I was so glad that she made it to the wedding. She dropped me an sms early last week and initiated the dinner, which is a surprise to me. Well....I'm looking forward to it. We have planned to go eat at one of my favourite place!

It is going to be three weeks of "bossless days".....